Meanwhile, in December 2001, I had a few blisters in my right cheek which Sangeeta's teachers at Indore Dr.Anup Vyas and Dr.Vilas Nevaskar examined. On suspicion, they decided to consult oncologist Dr.Deepak Agrawal. Dr.Agrawal suspected cancer cells developing in my cheek and decided to have a minor surgery, the very next day so as to remove the affected part and check it spreading to other parts of the mouth. A small excision was undertaken and two samples were sent to two different labs for analyses. A week later while one of the lab confirmed cancer, other didn't. This uncertainty was a reason for our dilemma. Ultimately it was decided that the sample must be examined at Tata Memorial Cancer Hospital, Mumbai for third advice. Our would-be son-in-law Dr.Kedar Nath personally took the sample to Mumbai and halted there for a week. He returned on the night of 1st January 2002 to Indore and telephoned me, "Tata Memorial confirmed the existence of cancer cells in the sample. We are planning to operate you for cancer at Suyash Hospital, Indore and Dr.Deepak Agrawal will perform the surgery.”
Madhuri asked, ‘What happened?’
"Cancer is confirmed," I replied.
I was shaken from the core. My heart felt a mild shock. I had seen several of my acquaintances undergoing surgery, radiotherapy, and chemotherapy and despite pain and suffering, succumbing to death within a year. Their faces and sufferings floated in my memory. I realized that my breaths were numbered now. My unsettled children, wife and a mountain of debts. These ideas coiled around me like a python. I asked myself, "What next?"
"Fetch me a glass of water," I asked Madhuri. She immediately obliged. After drinking water, I spread myself on the bed pulling mosquito-net around. My heart whispered, "Take it easy, have a sound sleep, will see the matter tomorrow."
Next morning Madhuri told me that I had begun snoring within two minutes.
**********
Dr. Thomas Fuller wrote, "Health is not valued till sickness comes." We continuously nourish our evil within us. We neglect the body that keeps our life encased, especially our food habits are notoriously bad. Unmindful of consequences we go on swallowing whatever we happen to find around and make our body sick. Lack of health awareness kicks us at the mercy of doctors and hospitals. A sick body induces the mind also to become sick. Why such kind of criminal negligence?
It was 1972 when I find difficult to wide open my mouth. My doctor friend Mahesh Kasliwal diagnosed ‘submucus Fibrosis’, initial symptoms of oral cancer. As a remedy, he had prescribed an injection which I had to get administered by Dr.P.K.Agrawal, dentist at the D.K.Hospital, Raipur. The doctor would fill the syringe with the medicine and inject it at eight to ten places within mouth at random soft palate, sides, cheek, tongue, lips etc. It was extremely painful and my mouth would bleed. Yet this penance proved futile. I could not stop myself from chewing tobacco. Dr.Mahesh Kasliwal would often reproach me, "Stop chewing tobacco lest you should die of cancer."
Intoxicants when they become habits turn into an addiction. People have their own justifications for their addiction. I too relied on these and then decided on 20th August 1993 to say goodbye to all the three, Paan, Supari and tobacco. But it was pretty late. The disease had taken roots in my body. Hence in 2002, I was in its grip.
A person becomes disturbed the moment he learns of suffering from cancer. The real trouble is not the disease but its fear. This is a typical kind of vamp. It may be appeased but quite often it remains unappeased and kills with a vengeance. People shiver by its mere name, a silent heart attack overtakes them. It is like death is dancing in front of his eyes. With the onslaught of this disease arrives a brigade of ‘Medical advisors' grow who would suggest you the guaranteed formula to cure the disease. Starting from cow urine therapy, they would suggest the self-urine cure, extract of wheat plants, Ayurvedic, the Indian cure pathy, homeopathic remedies. In addition to these name of a tribal quack, a Vaidya, the Ayurvedic doctor, from Banaras were brought to my knowledge. I was in a fix, whose shelter should I seek. Prominent among these free advice was ‘to resist from surgery because surgeon's knife causes it to spread.’
I began with one dose of a reputed homeopath but it made me extremely upset. My daughter Sangeeta and Kedarnath were in favor of surgery and that too without delay which would otherwise cause spreading over other organs of the body. I was in a triangle of troubles, the first was the scheduled marriage of Sangeeta on 15th February, the second was surgery just one month prior to the marriage function and the third was the delay which could turn fatal. Along with these, was the financial constraint.
The date of surgery was approaching closer while the pocket was getting depleted day by day. I would pretend to be normal showing no sign of panic whereas my mind became duller day by day. Every day seemed to be more and more difficult.
I was in my lodge when my close friend Ramakant Mishra Raja, who had taken VRS from The State Bank of India, came. We had tea together then he enquired, "when are you leaving for surgery?"
"I haven't yet planned."
"I suppose you were to leave immediately?"
"You know, surgery is not done for free.”
"How much would it take?"
"No idea, but might not be about a lakh.”
"Then?"
"Then..... I am dumbfounded." I replied.
The meeting came to an end. Raja left, after two hours he arrived and gave me a bundle of currency, "Here are seventy-two thousand. Take them and start for Indore without any delay. This is what I had in my account now. In case you need more, just give me a ring. I'll personally come to you with the additional money." He almost ordered me to leave.
My eyes welled with tears. I wondered, who would care to help a person inching towards death?
After three days, Madhuri and I reached Indore and met the surgeon Dr.Deepak Agrawal the same evening. I requested him to postpone the surgery till Sangeeta's marriage, promising that ‘I would report the very next day after her marriage.’
"Dwarika Prasadji, stop worrying about your daughter's marriage. We are here to see that everything is alright. You go straight to Suyash Hospital and get admitted now. You would be operated on day-after-tomorrow." Dr. Deepak Agrawal clarified.
"Is it so urgent?"
"Yes, that's why I insist."
"O.K. then do what you decide." I agreed.
From there we went to the hospital. Necessary tests were conducted on the next day. On the morning of 17th January 2002, a nurse came to get the consent paper prior to operation filled and asked Madhuri to sign it. Madhuri said me jokingly, ‘Today my signature is valuable.’
“Yes,” I said and we both burst into laughter. The nurse looked us in surprise. Maybe she found us different, as we were in merry before going for a crucial surgery.
After few minutes two ward boys dragged the stretcher trolley in. They took me towards the operation theater. My eyes were fixed on the ceiling while the stretcher was moving towards O.T.
I was laid on a surgery table and soon I was surrounded by a team of doctors and nurses. In the Operation theater, there was background track playing soft melodies of Late.Mohammad Rafi and I were just surprised by the song selected, Aaj mausam bada beimaan hai, aane wala koi toofan hai. Someone whispered to me, "We are giving you an injection, it will pain a little, O.K.?" The song dissolved in the air then suddenly I heard Dr.Agrawal's voice, "Dwarika Prasadji, get up. Your operation is over. Can you hear me.....?" I looked at him and tried to smile but couldn't because my mouth was stuffed with cotton.
I was told that the surgery lasted three and a half hours. Afterward, I was shifted to post operation care room. Oral intake of food was not possible, so with a tube, I was fed with water, milk, fruit juice. Since the mouth was stuffed with cotton I couldn't speak. So I started expressing with body gestures. You can imagine the mental state of a person who is neither allowed to eat nor to speak. But this is what one has to endure when such circumstances demand so.
Next morning the doctor came to enquire about my post-surgical condition. I confirmed my wellness through my gestures. My recovery was very fast so I was discharged from the hospital on the fifth day. When my daughter saw the bill, prior to discharge, she was surprised to see the amount, twenty-two thousand only, which was only hospital charges plus the cost of medicines. Surgeon Dr.Deepak Agrawal and his colleague Dr.Vilas Nevaskar did not charge their fees which were around Rs.ninety thousand. We went to Dr.Agrawal's chamber in the evening and enquired the reason forgoing his fees, ‘I don't have a right to charge fee.’ Dr.Deepak Agrawal said.
"Why?"
"Your daughter and son-in-law are doctors. How can we charge a fee? You just bless me."
Samples collected during surgery were sent to the lab so as to decide the next stage of treatment, Radiotherapy or Chemotherapy. Stitches of the surgery from my ear to the lips looked like a stitched gunny bag. We were advised to prolong our stay at Indore for a week to conduct the regular check up and cutting the stitches after healing.
While everyone used to enjoy delicious meals and breakfast I used to look at them with a feeling of temptation and condemn myself. Whenever they used to enjoy famous Alu-kachori with Chatni, I used to feel jealous because I was condemned to tube feeding through the nose. I was getting my due punishment for having enjoyed tobacco for such a long period. Those who are addicted to tobacco or cigarette they are well aware of the dangers of cancer, they also read the statutory warning but continue to delude themselves that it would not touch them while claiming others. It is one thing to suffer the disease and quite other to go on talking about it. When cancer attacks an individual the entire family suffers. Bad habits are like leeches who won't leave once they sting a person. Seeing what I have been suffering must have struck my elder brother and the younger one. Both of them are also addicted to tobacco. Yet, despite my plight, they could not get rid of addiction.
Twelve days after the surgery, my stitches were examined. Fully satisfied with my progress they removed the stitches with a smile he said, "It is my sheer luck to have a patient like you, Dwarika Prasadji".
"What is the matter, Doctor?” I asked.
"Whenever I asked how you were feeling, you always replied that you are far better than you earlier. Despite such a major surgery you never complained about pain while other patients raised a lot of hue and cry."
"Shall I tell you the truth?"
"Please."
"I did feel pain but it used to evaporate as soon as I saw you. Your painkiller pill is not as effective as your smile is." I replied.
Meanwhile pathology reports had been received. The samples proved to be in my favor and no further therapy was needed. My heart danced in pleasure. I felt like a convicted criminal being released from jail prior to completion of his turn on the grant of good conduct.Tube was removed from the nose and permission for oral feeding and returning home were granted.
**********
Little time was left for Sangeeta's marriage. Ornaments, clothes and other essential purchases had to be made. The guest list was to be compiled, invitation cards were to be printed and dispatched, relatives were to be invited on phones plus necessary precautions to keep me fit. All these had to be done simultaneously. Since time was a crucial factor hence whatever we could do at Indore was done then and there. The doctors had waived their fees and substantial cash was available from Raja’s and Rajkumar's financial help. Hence everything could be done at jet plane speed.
I returned to Bilaspur after my battle with cancer. I was back home though I didn't have time to take rest and recuperate. We have a social convention that people flock at the residence of a patient, in the way they greet a soldier returning from the front. This gives the patient a ‘feel good’. I did not have the luxury to spend my time. Very next day I accompanied with Madhuri, drove the scooter to distribute Sangeeta's wedding invitation cards. Everyone was taken aback, ‘I believe you have undergone cancer surgery!’
"Yes, now I am here." I used to say. Scratching their heads they would watch scars of surgery on my face look at me with bewildered eyes and then would discuss the wedding program.
By that time, the bank had sanctioned the loan. I could repay Ramakant Mishra's loan. Rajkumar got packets of sweet ready while elder brother offered with cash to enable me Tilak for the would-be son-in-law. My mother was with elder brother at Raipur. I had asked my younger brother to bring her to Indore to which he agreed. But in view of her weak health elder brother didn't permit her a long journey. Sangeeta’s marriage ceremony was over despite her Dadi’s, grandmother, absence.
With a number of boxes and packets, we boarded the train for Indore and reached there the next day. Both the parties were to lodge in a hotel. Prior to marriage, a feast was arranged at Chokhi Dhani with Rajasthani meals. Our entire family assembled, so had come several friends and relatives from distant places even abroad.
Next evening, Dulha, the groom, arrived with his family. Marriage procession began. After visiting a nearby temple the procession reached its destination. It was an extremely simple wedding without the ritual pomp and show off a music band, firework and dances. Watching the couple tying into the knot and exchanging garlands, my eyes welled with tears. Its delight only knew to father and mother when they marry their daughters. Everyone was happy for Sangeeta’s marriage except me and Madhuri, who didn’t know how to bear the pain of her absence in the family.
The next morning was the farewell. The heart was heavy and rest of the body exhausted. There was few ‘family type’ unpleasant incident too but such are quite normal during marriages. Since I was used to such ‘combats’ I didn't find anything odd or strange. It was almost like an inadvertent swallowing a piece of hot chili while chewing food.
Whatever amount was received from relatives and guests as the gift, I took it to my son-in-law requesting him to purchase whatever domestic items needed for the home.
"Keep it with you. I don't need." He said.
"Why? It is a gift from us." I insisted.
"O.K. If you insist I'll take just ten thousand to have a steel almirah. Other items we will buy from our earnings." He returned the remaining amount.
Sangeeta's father and mother-in-laws kept their promise and brought her to the hostel to enable her to prepare for studies. Exams were over without any problem.
**********
To be a daughter's father is exhilarating but equally distressing becomes her farewell from home. Questions continue to agitate the minds of parents, what kind of environment will she find there, how she adjust herself in the family etc. but boomerang and return without an answer. Every moment one expects a call informing, "I am fine Mummy ..... I am quite a happy Papa....." Normally Indian brides do not disclose their suffering to their parents lest they should feel hurt. So, we were always worried, whether she was really happy?
While returning from Indore I became extremely upset. An agony overtook me. Why we made such a hurry? Was she a burden to get her disposed of in haste? Shouldn't we have given a few more years for studies? A highly qualified bride is going to a small town, how will she feel there? Questions reverberated and scolded me all the while and I had to console myself with K.L.Sehgal's memorable farewell song, Babul mora naihar chhootahi jaye....., My father, I am bidden to heave my abode.
After reaching Bilaspur, we immersed ourselves in all kinds of activities. Sadness gradually dissolved. Time is the greatest healer.
The result arrived soon. Sangeeta, along with a photocopy of her B.D.S. Certificate sent me a covering note:
(Dated) 12-05-2003
Dear Papa & Mummy,
With your blessings and constant untiring efforts our dream is fulfilled and you lazy daughter has become a certified doctor.
My endeavors will be to ensure that its benefit reaches every patient who comes to me. This highly prized degree won on dint of hard work is dedicated to you. The path that Kammu and I could find, soon Sangya too will tread on it, and this is what I hope. Our family is going to be a model for others. Amen.
Your daughter
Sangeeta.
Madhuri asked, ‘What happened?’
"Cancer is confirmed," I replied.
I was shaken from the core. My heart felt a mild shock. I had seen several of my acquaintances undergoing surgery, radiotherapy, and chemotherapy and despite pain and suffering, succumbing to death within a year. Their faces and sufferings floated in my memory. I realized that my breaths were numbered now. My unsettled children, wife and a mountain of debts. These ideas coiled around me like a python. I asked myself, "What next?"
"Fetch me a glass of water," I asked Madhuri. She immediately obliged. After drinking water, I spread myself on the bed pulling mosquito-net around. My heart whispered, "Take it easy, have a sound sleep, will see the matter tomorrow."
Next morning Madhuri told me that I had begun snoring within two minutes.
**********
Dr. Thomas Fuller wrote, "Health is not valued till sickness comes." We continuously nourish our evil within us. We neglect the body that keeps our life encased, especially our food habits are notoriously bad. Unmindful of consequences we go on swallowing whatever we happen to find around and make our body sick. Lack of health awareness kicks us at the mercy of doctors and hospitals. A sick body induces the mind also to become sick. Why such kind of criminal negligence?
It was 1972 when I find difficult to wide open my mouth. My doctor friend Mahesh Kasliwal diagnosed ‘submucus Fibrosis’, initial symptoms of oral cancer. As a remedy, he had prescribed an injection which I had to get administered by Dr.P.K.Agrawal, dentist at the D.K.Hospital, Raipur. The doctor would fill the syringe with the medicine and inject it at eight to ten places within mouth at random soft palate, sides, cheek, tongue, lips etc. It was extremely painful and my mouth would bleed. Yet this penance proved futile. I could not stop myself from chewing tobacco. Dr.Mahesh Kasliwal would often reproach me, "Stop chewing tobacco lest you should die of cancer."
Intoxicants when they become habits turn into an addiction. People have their own justifications for their addiction. I too relied on these and then decided on 20th August 1993 to say goodbye to all the three, Paan, Supari and tobacco. But it was pretty late. The disease had taken roots in my body. Hence in 2002, I was in its grip.
A person becomes disturbed the moment he learns of suffering from cancer. The real trouble is not the disease but its fear. This is a typical kind of vamp. It may be appeased but quite often it remains unappeased and kills with a vengeance. People shiver by its mere name, a silent heart attack overtakes them. It is like death is dancing in front of his eyes. With the onslaught of this disease arrives a brigade of ‘Medical advisors' grow who would suggest you the guaranteed formula to cure the disease. Starting from cow urine therapy, they would suggest the self-urine cure, extract of wheat plants, Ayurvedic, the Indian cure pathy, homeopathic remedies. In addition to these name of a tribal quack, a Vaidya, the Ayurvedic doctor, from Banaras were brought to my knowledge. I was in a fix, whose shelter should I seek. Prominent among these free advice was ‘to resist from surgery because surgeon's knife causes it to spread.’
I began with one dose of a reputed homeopath but it made me extremely upset. My daughter Sangeeta and Kedarnath were in favor of surgery and that too without delay which would otherwise cause spreading over other organs of the body. I was in a triangle of troubles, the first was the scheduled marriage of Sangeeta on 15th February, the second was surgery just one month prior to the marriage function and the third was the delay which could turn fatal. Along with these, was the financial constraint.
The date of surgery was approaching closer while the pocket was getting depleted day by day. I would pretend to be normal showing no sign of panic whereas my mind became duller day by day. Every day seemed to be more and more difficult.
I was in my lodge when my close friend Ramakant Mishra Raja, who had taken VRS from The State Bank of India, came. We had tea together then he enquired, "when are you leaving for surgery?"
"I haven't yet planned."
"I suppose you were to leave immediately?"
"You know, surgery is not done for free.”
"How much would it take?"
"No idea, but might not be about a lakh.”
"Then?"
"Then..... I am dumbfounded." I replied.
The meeting came to an end. Raja left, after two hours he arrived and gave me a bundle of currency, "Here are seventy-two thousand. Take them and start for Indore without any delay. This is what I had in my account now. In case you need more, just give me a ring. I'll personally come to you with the additional money." He almost ordered me to leave.
My eyes welled with tears. I wondered, who would care to help a person inching towards death?
After three days, Madhuri and I reached Indore and met the surgeon Dr.Deepak Agrawal the same evening. I requested him to postpone the surgery till Sangeeta's marriage, promising that ‘I would report the very next day after her marriage.’
"Dwarika Prasadji, stop worrying about your daughter's marriage. We are here to see that everything is alright. You go straight to Suyash Hospital and get admitted now. You would be operated on day-after-tomorrow." Dr. Deepak Agrawal clarified.
"Is it so urgent?"
"Yes, that's why I insist."
"O.K. then do what you decide." I agreed.
From there we went to the hospital. Necessary tests were conducted on the next day. On the morning of 17th January 2002, a nurse came to get the consent paper prior to operation filled and asked Madhuri to sign it. Madhuri said me jokingly, ‘Today my signature is valuable.’
“Yes,” I said and we both burst into laughter. The nurse looked us in surprise. Maybe she found us different, as we were in merry before going for a crucial surgery.
After few minutes two ward boys dragged the stretcher trolley in. They took me towards the operation theater. My eyes were fixed on the ceiling while the stretcher was moving towards O.T.
I was laid on a surgery table and soon I was surrounded by a team of doctors and nurses. In the Operation theater, there was background track playing soft melodies of Late.Mohammad Rafi and I were just surprised by the song selected, Aaj mausam bada beimaan hai, aane wala koi toofan hai. Someone whispered to me, "We are giving you an injection, it will pain a little, O.K.?" The song dissolved in the air then suddenly I heard Dr.Agrawal's voice, "Dwarika Prasadji, get up. Your operation is over. Can you hear me.....?" I looked at him and tried to smile but couldn't because my mouth was stuffed with cotton.
I was told that the surgery lasted three and a half hours. Afterward, I was shifted to post operation care room. Oral intake of food was not possible, so with a tube, I was fed with water, milk, fruit juice. Since the mouth was stuffed with cotton I couldn't speak. So I started expressing with body gestures. You can imagine the mental state of a person who is neither allowed to eat nor to speak. But this is what one has to endure when such circumstances demand so.
Next morning the doctor came to enquire about my post-surgical condition. I confirmed my wellness through my gestures. My recovery was very fast so I was discharged from the hospital on the fifth day. When my daughter saw the bill, prior to discharge, she was surprised to see the amount, twenty-two thousand only, which was only hospital charges plus the cost of medicines. Surgeon Dr.Deepak Agrawal and his colleague Dr.Vilas Nevaskar did not charge their fees which were around Rs.ninety thousand. We went to Dr.Agrawal's chamber in the evening and enquired the reason forgoing his fees, ‘I don't have a right to charge fee.’ Dr.Deepak Agrawal said.
"Why?"
"Your daughter and son-in-law are doctors. How can we charge a fee? You just bless me."
Samples collected during surgery were sent to the lab so as to decide the next stage of treatment, Radiotherapy or Chemotherapy. Stitches of the surgery from my ear to the lips looked like a stitched gunny bag. We were advised to prolong our stay at Indore for a week to conduct the regular check up and cutting the stitches after healing.
While everyone used to enjoy delicious meals and breakfast I used to look at them with a feeling of temptation and condemn myself. Whenever they used to enjoy famous Alu-kachori with Chatni, I used to feel jealous because I was condemned to tube feeding through the nose. I was getting my due punishment for having enjoyed tobacco for such a long period. Those who are addicted to tobacco or cigarette they are well aware of the dangers of cancer, they also read the statutory warning but continue to delude themselves that it would not touch them while claiming others. It is one thing to suffer the disease and quite other to go on talking about it. When cancer attacks an individual the entire family suffers. Bad habits are like leeches who won't leave once they sting a person. Seeing what I have been suffering must have struck my elder brother and the younger one. Both of them are also addicted to tobacco. Yet, despite my plight, they could not get rid of addiction.
Twelve days after the surgery, my stitches were examined. Fully satisfied with my progress they removed the stitches with a smile he said, "It is my sheer luck to have a patient like you, Dwarika Prasadji".
"What is the matter, Doctor?” I asked.
"Whenever I asked how you were feeling, you always replied that you are far better than you earlier. Despite such a major surgery you never complained about pain while other patients raised a lot of hue and cry."
"Shall I tell you the truth?"
"Please."
"I did feel pain but it used to evaporate as soon as I saw you. Your painkiller pill is not as effective as your smile is." I replied.
Meanwhile pathology reports had been received. The samples proved to be in my favor and no further therapy was needed. My heart danced in pleasure. I felt like a convicted criminal being released from jail prior to completion of his turn on the grant of good conduct.Tube was removed from the nose and permission for oral feeding and returning home were granted.
**********
Little time was left for Sangeeta's marriage. Ornaments, clothes and other essential purchases had to be made. The guest list was to be compiled, invitation cards were to be printed and dispatched, relatives were to be invited on phones plus necessary precautions to keep me fit. All these had to be done simultaneously. Since time was a crucial factor hence whatever we could do at Indore was done then and there. The doctors had waived their fees and substantial cash was available from Raja’s and Rajkumar's financial help. Hence everything could be done at jet plane speed.
I returned to Bilaspur after my battle with cancer. I was back home though I didn't have time to take rest and recuperate. We have a social convention that people flock at the residence of a patient, in the way they greet a soldier returning from the front. This gives the patient a ‘feel good’. I did not have the luxury to spend my time. Very next day I accompanied with Madhuri, drove the scooter to distribute Sangeeta's wedding invitation cards. Everyone was taken aback, ‘I believe you have undergone cancer surgery!’
"Yes, now I am here." I used to say. Scratching their heads they would watch scars of surgery on my face look at me with bewildered eyes and then would discuss the wedding program.
By that time, the bank had sanctioned the loan. I could repay Ramakant Mishra's loan. Rajkumar got packets of sweet ready while elder brother offered with cash to enable me Tilak for the would-be son-in-law. My mother was with elder brother at Raipur. I had asked my younger brother to bring her to Indore to which he agreed. But in view of her weak health elder brother didn't permit her a long journey. Sangeeta’s marriage ceremony was over despite her Dadi’s, grandmother, absence.
With a number of boxes and packets, we boarded the train for Indore and reached there the next day. Both the parties were to lodge in a hotel. Prior to marriage, a feast was arranged at Chokhi Dhani with Rajasthani meals. Our entire family assembled, so had come several friends and relatives from distant places even abroad.
Next evening, Dulha, the groom, arrived with his family. Marriage procession began. After visiting a nearby temple the procession reached its destination. It was an extremely simple wedding without the ritual pomp and show off a music band, firework and dances. Watching the couple tying into the knot and exchanging garlands, my eyes welled with tears. Its delight only knew to father and mother when they marry their daughters. Everyone was happy for Sangeeta’s marriage except me and Madhuri, who didn’t know how to bear the pain of her absence in the family.
The next morning was the farewell. The heart was heavy and rest of the body exhausted. There was few ‘family type’ unpleasant incident too but such are quite normal during marriages. Since I was used to such ‘combats’ I didn't find anything odd or strange. It was almost like an inadvertent swallowing a piece of hot chili while chewing food.
Whatever amount was received from relatives and guests as the gift, I took it to my son-in-law requesting him to purchase whatever domestic items needed for the home.
"Keep it with you. I don't need." He said.
"Why? It is a gift from us." I insisted.
"O.K. If you insist I'll take just ten thousand to have a steel almirah. Other items we will buy from our earnings." He returned the remaining amount.
Sangeeta's father and mother-in-laws kept their promise and brought her to the hostel to enable her to prepare for studies. Exams were over without any problem.
**********
To be a daughter's father is exhilarating but equally distressing becomes her farewell from home. Questions continue to agitate the minds of parents, what kind of environment will she find there, how she adjust herself in the family etc. but boomerang and return without an answer. Every moment one expects a call informing, "I am fine Mummy ..... I am quite a happy Papa....." Normally Indian brides do not disclose their suffering to their parents lest they should feel hurt. So, we were always worried, whether she was really happy?
While returning from Indore I became extremely upset. An agony overtook me. Why we made such a hurry? Was she a burden to get her disposed of in haste? Shouldn't we have given a few more years for studies? A highly qualified bride is going to a small town, how will she feel there? Questions reverberated and scolded me all the while and I had to console myself with K.L.Sehgal's memorable farewell song, Babul mora naihar chhootahi jaye....., My father, I am bidden to heave my abode.
After reaching Bilaspur, we immersed ourselves in all kinds of activities. Sadness gradually dissolved. Time is the greatest healer.
The result arrived soon. Sangeeta, along with a photocopy of her B.D.S. Certificate sent me a covering note:
(Dated) 12-05-2003
Dear Papa & Mummy,
With your blessings and constant untiring efforts our dream is fulfilled and you lazy daughter has become a certified doctor.
My endeavors will be to ensure that its benefit reaches every patient who comes to me. This highly prized degree won on dint of hard work is dedicated to you. The path that Kammu and I could find, soon Sangya too will tread on it, and this is what I hope. Our family is going to be a model for others. Amen.
Your daughter
Sangeeta.
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